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Open Letter

from The Ruby by Bee Sahatji

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    My 2015 album The Ruby on a bright red cassette tape. Includes download, and features hand-drawn artwork by Jeri Lance. Only 100 copies available!

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about

This song is an open letter to all survivors, or anyone whose self confidence has been affected by oppression, especially sexual assault and sexism. It is informed by my own experiences, the experiences of others in my life. Writing this particular song was brought on by listening to one story on the Dear Sugar podcast episode 7, "The Hidden Worlds of Guilt and Shame"(TW for sexual assault if you are going to listen to it).

lyrics

Wanted to write you for awhile now and say that I see you
wanted to tell you but I didn't know how, something I know is true
when every inch of you makes an apology just for taking up space
you know, you don't displace anything more deserving
I see you, I believe you, and I know there's lots of stories that will never get told.
I know how dangerous it is to feel the will in others to deny what you lived as real
You woke up with strange hands on you, felt the need to be polite evenn as you withdrew
Sick to your stomach for being nice, how'd they make me feel like I deserve this?
One in despair could be misconstrued as shy, and every time someone asks you why you don't smile, the muffled rage as you try to hold together, been in bed for weeks just trying to get better
and the layers of distrust are there, it's hard to heal from something so fucking unfair
I can see you out in the sun, I can hear you laughing and you're louder than everyone
Loving so hard and unafraid, you're happy and you deserve it.

credits

from The Ruby, track released December 20, 2015
Brenna-guitar, voice
TJ Minich-bass, drums

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about

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Bee Sahatji Portland, Oregon

Bee Sahatji is a Portland, OR based songwriter and a member of Portland bands Strangeweather and Aradia. Former member of Riot-folk Collective.

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